It's ok, Lindz, Sometimes You Have To Make Some Sacrifices for the Public Well Being
I was trying to come up with something exciting or even a tad amusing to write about for my first blog in roughly six months. Apparently E! was reading my mind when I connected to the internet and what do ya know, Lindsay Lohan’s face shows up on my internet default, the MSN News Website with the headline, “Lindsay Lohan Going to Jail”. I had the indescribable pleasure of watching a video clip of the judge sentencing Lindsay to 90 days in jail for violating terms of probation, and honestly, Lindsay, what other choice does the judge have when you show up to his/her courtroom looking like a hairstylist residing in a Florida mobile home park?! For crying out loud, your hair is blonde with dingy bathwater colored roots-you can try, but there is no getting rid of that red head image with cinematic greats such as Freaky Friday and Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen under your belt. Your only hope for living without an oxygen tank by 42 is taking some advice from a few West Virginia coal miners as to who are the best pulmonary doctors. And your smoking shows. And the picture ain’t no Mona Lisa. Especially when your crying face has more wrinkles and folds than Origami Night at a nursing home. I almost feel bad about making fun of her. Well, not really. I feel bad for those who feel that they should lie low, or should I say LiLo, on the Lohan jokes, since the subject has become more worn out than her….wait for it….career. (You thought I was going to say something else didn’t you?!)

Speaking of the infamous Lohan clan, I was able to catch a glimpse of Larry King Live about a week ago, and since Larry has recently announced he is (finally!) throwing in the towel, he made it quite clear that only the most sophisticated and well respected guests would make appearances on his show. Of course, who better embodies class than the owner of the Lohan gene cess pool than father Michael Lohan. Stop the games, Mike. We all know you secretly just want to party with Lindsay and freeload off her coke connects, so stop whining about her quest for well being. I think you would be doing everyone a favor if you just split the sentence with Lindsay, 50/50.


Log in